That night, Tessa wouldn’t settle unless I held her upright.
Timothy needed another bottle before I finished feeding Tara.
My water sat three feet away, but I couldn’t reach it without waking two of the babies.
His phone buzzed through the wall.
He declined the call.
I stared at the screen.
Then I looked at the three tiny faces around me.
“All right,” I whispered. “I heard you.”
***
The next morning, I began logging every feeding, diaper change, pumping session, chore, and minute of sleep.
A week later, Ethan walked into the kitchen wearing sunglasses on top of his head.
He placed a printed booking confirmation on the counter.
“I booked a trip to Cabo.”
I looked at the paper.
“For us?”
I waited for him to laugh.
He didn’t.
“You booked yourself a vacation?”
“I need to recover.”
“From what?”
He waved one hand toward the nursery.
“I haven’t slept longer than 40 minutes at a time in six weeks.”
“That’s different.”
“Why?”
“Because this is what you wanted, Kyra.”
“I wanted children,” I said. “I didn’t want to become a single mother while married.”
“I love them.”
“I can’t help anyone if I fall apart.”
“You haven’t helped anyone while holding yourself together, Ethan.”
His jaw tightened.
“I’m burned out, Kyra.”
I looked at Timothy’s tiny hand curled around my finger.
“Who takes care of me while you’re gone?”
“You’ll manage. Honestly, your hormones are making this bigger than it is.”
I looked down at the baby in my arms.
Six weeks old.
A body that still hurt when I stood too quickly.
And a husband packing for the beach.
“No,” I said. “I think I’ve finally started seeing everything for what it is.”
He left the room.
***
That evening, I used our shared tablet to order more diapers.
A message appeared at the top of the screen.
“We’ll meet you at the resort Thursday. Ben already booked his flight.”
Ethan entered the room and froze.
“You invited your friends?”
“Only for a few days.”
“You said you needed to be alone. You called this a solo adventure.”
“I need to be away from all this. That’s what I meant.”
I stood slowly.
“All this has names.”
“Kyra, don’t start.”
“Say them.”
“What?”
He rubbed his forehead.
